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This weekend my girls had Prom. With our family. At home.
Six of my eight children are no longer in their school setting. They are working/learning virtually. They are participating in Zoom meetings. They are on "screens" many hours a day. Everything has changed.
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Several years ago, in early 2014, I was on the Struggle Bus with some of the personalities in my home.
Yep, I was overwhelmed with my kids. One in particular lied to me constantly, on a daily basis. It was difficult. I didn’t know how to handle the challenges. My “normal” of being Queen Mom didn’t stop the bad behavior. The pain in the home escalated. The lying and behaviors got worse. I became fiercely negative. It.was.not.pretty. It is Monday of Holy Week and I am crying.
Why am I crying? Well, on Friday we will begin saying The Divine Mercy Novena as a family and I was thinking of all of the changes that have happened in our lives through this powerful novena and I just got overwhelmed. Grace does that sometimes. Now, you and I are living in a crazy time in 2020. We are scared. Freaked out. Our lives are in limbo with this Coronavirus. If you are “stuck at home” with “no place to go,” teach your children all those things you always wanted to teach them, but never had the time to do!
Now, some of you mothers had your lists made two weeks ago and you have become a massive Skills Teacher. Congratulations. Seriously. That’s awesome. That has never been me. (By the way, my name is Lori Doerneman. I have been married for 32 years and my husband Russ and I have 8 children. I live and write in a small town near Wichita, Kansas.) My friend inspired me this week.
Her family is thriving right now. It was incredibly good for me to hear her joy and I wanted to share it with you. Now, just so you know the back story, this particular friend is an operating room nurse. Since people aren’t scheduling surgeries right now, she probably won’t be needed at her workplace for a month or so. I never thought I’d say this, but we are setting up for homeschooling.
On Monday, March 30, 2020, because of the Coronavirus and our schools shutting down for the school year, this new adventure begins. I have one fifth grader and three high schoolers. (Plus a college student, but he doesn’t need or want my help!) We are also under “order” from our county commissioner to stay at home unless we have to work or get necessities. I have never spent as much time writing a post as I have for this one. In the last four days I have written and deleted, over and over.
Which means that I am still processing. Last night, before I went to sleep, I wrote out these questions on the notepad beside my bed:
I woke up early with some big thoughts. This entire year I’ve been writing about Creating a Beautiful Family Culture. Well, it’s no longer “dream and scheme” time. It’s GO TIME.
Right now, with a world-wide crisis, you are being presented with a massive opportunity to dive deeper into Family Living. You can do it. You, as the parent, have INCREDIBLE power in your home right now. Imagine sitting down with your newly-engaged daughter and asking her these questions:
What do you think she would say? She’d most likely gush that she wants a fabulous marriage. She wants a great relationship with her husband. Last week I stumbled onto a Netflix show called “Love is Blind” and I, well, I got sucked in. It’s not a show I’d recommend, simply because it is incredibly superficial (think The Bachelorette) but it taught me something.
People are clueless on what it takes to have a good, strong, solid relationship. As I watched the stories unfold, I realized just how fantastic my marriage really is! I had been thinking that my husband and I were a bit disconnected. In reality, Russ and I are crushing it. |
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